Research has shown that newborn babies survive better and progress faster when they are held often. When they are cuddled and touched. One of my in-law cousins had a premature birth some years ago. The only reason the baby girl survived was because the mother spent hours in the hospital holding and cuddling the child. The baby would not eat, would not settle down, and cried constantly until the mother was asked to spend the constant watch with her newborn child. And the baby survived! We are all creatures that survive life in many various ways. But survival is greatly enhanced when we are touched on a regular basis. Think about it. What little things give us the greatest warm fuzzies? Often, simply being touched makes us feel good about ourselves and hopeful about our capabilities to carry on in this world. We all need to be touched. Some time ago, there was an advertisement campaign by a popular long distance phone company that asked us to reach out and touch someone. The campaign did well. But they were also right on target on the principle. We need to reach out more often and touch more people. Now, of course, we are not talking sexually explicit touching. Only social or casual touching. Well save sexuality as another topic of discussion to be treated another time. Women are a good example of touching. They are willing to walk up to virtually anyone and put a hand on someones shoulder, arm, or hand. Most women dont mind being touched, hugged or embraced. You can get a feel for it on a progressive basis. When you are having a stand up conversation, reach out and take hold of someones arm as you are making a point. Or gently touch them on the shoulder in reaction to what they are saying. Gauge their immediate reaction and go with it. Not everyone is comfortable with being touched. Myself, I love it! I am one of those touchy-feely kind of people. I love the brush of the hand. I love the lingering palm upon my arm or shoulder. I find it a tool to gauge the closeness quotient of how much a person wants to get to know you better. And give hugs freely when you feel so moved to do so. A hug is a gift of friendship. A gift of hope and encouragement. A gift of caring. Give hugs! To touch or not to touch. That is the question. When you touch someone, look into their eyes and smile. This accomplishes three things. (1)Your touch lets them know you are with them. (2)Your gaze lets them know they have your attention. (3)Your smile lets them know that you care. The typical reaction will either be a moving away from you (usually slight or subtle). Or they will lean in to you, indicating that they appreciate your closeness and you are not invading their personal bubble or space. Touching releases those feel-good hormones that can lift us and carry us forward. Touching and being touched renews our sense of well-being and confidence in what we have done or need to do. Look for opportunities to share. Look for opportunities to become closer to more people. Look for those special opportunities to touchand be touched! |
