Trust is the glue that holds couples together. Trust provides a sense of safety and security in a relationship.

When trust breaks down, people feel unsafe and insecure, and the glue that holds the relationship together begins to weaken.

How to re-build trust

In order to begin to re-build trust in a relationship after it has been weakened, you need to begin to ask some questions.

What does trust look like to you?

What does trust look like to your partner?

What small things, if done on a consistent and regular basis, will begin to re-build and restore the weakened trust?

The answers to these questions can begin to give you a map for restoring trust and healing the relationship.

A map toward trust

On a scale of one to ten, with ten being the highest, what is the current level of trust?

What would you like it to be?

Let's say the current level of trust is a 4 and you would like it to be a 10. Doing some higher math, (10 - 4) we have 6 levels of trust to build to. That's a long way. So we break it down into manageable chunks. What will it take for trust to grow from a 4 to a 5, from a 5 to a 6, and so on.

Jeff Herring

Jeff is a marriage and family therapist, singles and relationship coach, mentor coach, speaker, syndicated relationship columnist and author.

Jeff has a full time private practice in Tallahassee in which he specializes in couples, teen and parent counseling. He also is a relationship coach specializing in working with couples and singles. Some of his professional activities include:

==> Internationally syndicated relationship columnist through Knight-Ridder/Tribune Media Services, with a weekly readership of over 10 million worldwide

==> Sought after speaker for organizations, associations, churches, and corporations

==>Twice weekly appearances on The Steve and Sara Show on Magic 107.1

==> Author of "Keep the Changes: 52 Tools for Successful Living" a collection of his best columns, as well as several e-books including "How to Create a Passionate and Loving Relationship.........Forever," "How to Beat the BOZOs: Dealing with difficult people without becoming one," and "Tame Your Teen: THE survival guide for parenting your teenager.

==> Founder and CEO of TheArticleGuy.com

==> Founder and CEO of SecretsofGreatRelationships.com

==> Founder and CEO of ParentingYourTeeanger.com

==> Founder and CEO of ToolsforSuccessfulLiving.com

==> President of BuildingYourIdealPractice.com

==> President of ConsciousDatingTallahassee.com