Most relationships do not end with a happy ending. Some breakups are sad, some are neutral, and some leave you stunned. Why is it, when you break off a relationship with the wrong person, it stings even more? Being involved with Mr. Wrong seems to be the more difficult relationships, because there is not chance to relive the relationship and see what you could have done differently, you simply have to grieve the losses, and try to move on.

With people that we are normally mismatched with, we tend to know what those differences are easily. For example, say you dont wish to have children, and that other person does, it is easy to say why the relationship will not work. Now, in cases where you are involved with Mr. Wrong, the lines arent always so clear. Mr. Wrong can leave you dumb founded with what went badly, its also a mismatch, but often we seem to try harder with some people to make a relationship work.

At times when we have a relationship with someone we invest a certain amount of time in with that person. We get to know them, their likes/dislikes, and we eagerly learn about their desires. With Mr. Wrong we so often invest more than that time, because the relationship is difficult. So the normal amount of energy goes into the relationship plus you add on the energy you spend in what is making the relationship difficult.

Since we are putting more energy into the relationship we have a larger investment into the relationship. This extra energy we have put into the relationship bonds us that much more into the relationship, and it is harder to break those ties. One thing to realize is that whether or not the energy is good or bad, as long as it is invested into the relationship, it is forging additional ties, ties that will be harder to break.

Mr. / Ms. Wrong is a difficult person to separate from. We will continue to play through in our head different scenarios of what could have or should have happened. We will continually work through situations with that other person and how we could have handled it differently. Chances are, very little would have worked out well. Sometimes just realizing that we are still playing through that relationship in our heads may be enough to help us break a few of those ties.

So, now that the relationship that went badly is over. Grieve what you lost, that person wasnt all bad, but very few relationships are really meant to be. If you need to write down the things that went badly, write down lies that were told, large misunderstandings that should have never happened, and read that list from time to time. Use this has a guide to help you break those bonds with that person, so you can be free to move onto the right person.