So you havent lost 10 lbs. Youre still screaming at the kids. You havent given up nagging your partner. You missed the deadline to enroll in that night class. And you havent started paying off those credit card bills. Dont despair, all is not lost! One of the major reasons we abandon our New Years Resolutions is because they are should driven. What does that mean and what can I do about it? It means that a goal is made because we feel we should. They are goals we feel obligated or pressured to make. They are not the type of goals that spring from our deepest desires fed by our hopes and dreams. For example: Your partner thinks you carry a years supply of food storage around your middle. Your mother gives you that youre bad look each time you raise your voice with your children. The Problem To please your partner and mom you set yourself the goals to loose weight and to quit yelling at the kids. However, when you stop to really think about it, you personally dont care to fit into a bikini again nor do you deem your tone of voice with the children as excessively loud. Both of these goals were set out of a sense of should and not want to. And that is a major reason why many of our New Years Resolutions never last long. For goals to have staying power they must come from an inner desire and not external pressure. The Solution If youve forgotten your New Years Resolutions revisit them and decide which one or two you might wish to scrap. And then sit down again and allow yourself to create one or two goals that truly come from your heart. Goals that propel you towards your purpose here on earth, goals that will guide you to make a difference in your own life and in the lives of others. Leave the nit picky goals behind and reach high, dream big and then allow your heart to be your guide in making them real. When you do this youll find things [like eating habits and patience] fall into place much more readily. |
