"He who asks a question may be a fool for five minutes, but he who never asks a question remains a fool forever." Tom J. Connelly While killing time at my younger childrens swimming lesson, I usually sit and do some reading and note-taking for whatever topic I am concentrating on in my Coaching. I am one of the few parents who dont sit pool-side, as I have found if I do this I get too hot, but also the children concentrate more on me than their lesson! So I sit out on some very hard, uncomfortable benches and enjoy the opportunity to read. Occasionally I chat to other people, but mostly I read and write.and have become an object of curiosity, as I found out this week. A woman who is regularly there to collect her son from the class before ours finally plucked up the courage to ask me what I was doing. That led to some other parents joining in and asking me questions about what I do and why I am always reading and researching. It was good to explain that I enjoy learning new things to help me be the best Coach I can be. My education did not stop when I got my Coaching Diploma! As she left, I said that I really didnt mind her questions and, next time, please just ask! Later the issue of asking and questions came up again when I was in touch with a young friend who is having some family problems. The family exchanges seem to consist of shouting-matches or silences. I have encouraged him to choose his moment carefully and ask all the questions that are running around his head. Those questions, while they remain unanswered, will only serve to make him feel worse, but also will add to the family tension. So, this week, what questions do you need to ask? What have you been putting off for fear of asking? What questions can you ask this week that will help to move you forward? What do you need to know? Who do you need to ask? This could be either at work or elsewhere. Think about what you are trying to achieve. Sometimes the right question asked of the right person can provide the key to progress. What will your question be? Which questions have you not asked that wont go away? They run around your head, taking valuable thinking-space and pop up at the most awkward moments. Stop putting it off and start asking! If you need to, jot the questions down on some paper to help you make sense of them. Your head will be a much less cluttered place without them! Ask questions of yourself. What do I really, really want? Take it further. Be specific. What do I want from my job? What do I want from my relationships? Go as far as you can. Then - How can I make this happen? What steps do I need to take? Break it down by questioning yourself. Ask yourself What can I do to add more activity into my day? Others can make suggestions until theyre blue in the face, but only you will know what is right for you and what will fit in with your other commitments. Choose something that youll enjoy and that youll stick to. Dont forget, every little bit of activity counts, so if you can only do a bit here, a bit there etc, it all adds up! Have you asked yourself recently about why you do the things you do? If not, make this the week that you do. If you are doing things because you have to, you will not be so committed to them and will not feel engaged. This may mean that you need to do some negotiating to get the task reassigned, or perhaps you need to look at it in a different way and approach it from a different angle. What can I do today to add something new to my life? What a great question! This opens you up for so many new experiences. Enjoy! How can you get creative this week with your questions or something else? You can be creative in so many ways. How many can you think of that appeal to you? Where can you make space to express that creativity in your daily life? What does asking a question cost? A bit of thinking time and some effort while speaking to make your words clear. What is the worst that can happen if you ask for something? You could get a negative response. Will the world come to a standstill? No. On the other hand you may be rewarded with the positive answer you are looking for or with some new information which will help you work better or live better. So how can you find out? You only have to ask. |
